Undercover (Jonas Brothers) Lover -The Final Frontier

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After two previous sting operations (see here and here), I think these Jonaikas* are finally starting to see the light. Still, to drive the point home, I felt it was time to bring in the big guns.

*you’ll have to ask them what this means

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Comments

  1. elizabeth3hersh says:

    I’m going for the grandfather (who made the dad who made the kids). :-)

    • I’m going for their great, great grandfather, Jebediah Jonas,who followed his dream of owning land of his own by coming to this great country of ours. He took to wife Miss Hortense Stewart, the prettiest spinster in town, and he rode her like a horse. This beget Josiah Jonas, who beget James Jonas, who beget Joseph Jonas, Sr., who beget a passel of singing Jonas brothers by infusing the drops of life of himself and his forbears.

      • elizabeth3hersh says:

        Funny as all get out Lisa!! I’m reading a book on the 1893 (Chicago) World’s Fair where the fair’s architect, Daniel Burnham, writes to his wife during a prolonged absence “you must expect to give yourself up when you come.” I’m betting Jebediah can get ‘down and dirty’ as any virile youngster today.

      • HA!!!!

        This is a visual masterpiece, Lisa. You should beget(ting) an award!

        *crickets chirping*

    • Now we can be related!

      Though, truth be told, I’d rather have the Great Grandfather. (Less time commitment.)

  2. I just knew that even Ben Matlock couldn’t resist the Jonas Brothers. There really is no hope…sigh…

  3. Mr. Matlock sure keeps trendy for his age. I’m glad you set him upon those fakers. I love how you also know the lingo of the teens of today worldwide, because I believe the children are our future, teach them well and let them lead the way!

  4. I’ll go for the mother when the father is not looking. Come one everyone if you go for it in the open then everyone will know and you’ll have them pop-a-rot-zs after you.

    Come on beschooled if that is the best questions those boys can ask I bet their singing is nothing but lip-sync.

  5. Matlock cracking down on perps makes me think of paedophilia :-(

  6. Yess was really bitter, saying they weren’t special to ‘they mom’. I would have said: “No, Yess, No! You mustn’t talk about they mom!” Nice little exchange with Nisa, though, you were like her big sister.

  7. Ben Matlock is such a hardass. That must be why all the old folks love him so vr vr much. Or dote on him. I think old people still do the “doting” thing. Seeing Ben kick the fake Jonaikas right in they’re sham asses no doubt gives them some sort of almost-usable woody, if that’s still in fact possible at their age. I have no idea. I’m literally several decades younger than the youngest Matlock fan.

    Still, lack of viable erections notwithstanding (oh hell yes that pun was intentional), at least they know how to spell and who they mom is, amiright? Their mom was some sort of breeding mill doing business under the name of Martha who gave birth to 19 children before she hit thirty and 21 more before she was allowed to retire to the local ungated community, where she received several mimeographed copies of a “Mother of the Year” award and probably some stitches down in the birth canal area. I’m kind of summarizing here. Most of my information is kind of pieced together from a 1967 World Book encyclopedia and a factory-second copy of “The Handmaiden’s Tale,” which is missing pages 81-97 and 213-302.

    It’s great to see you back in action, bschooled. Isn’t a stable internet connection wonderful?

    • CLT! Somehow I missed this incredibly Jonaikas comment! (If this doesn’t make sense, try switching “incredibly” and “Jonaikas” around. Or stick them at the end of the sentence, maybe? Eventually something has to click.)

      I could be wrong, but I’m thinking my obliviousness might have had something to do with the “stitches in the birth canal” reference. For some reason my subconscious blocks out all comments with sentences containing the words “stitches” “down” “birth” and “canal” .

      Sad, really. But the good news is you can help! For only twenty dollars a day (that’s less than the cost of a pot of Starbucks coffee!) you can help me overcome this fear.

      In return for your generous support, your blog will be listed on my largely ignored blogroll (done!). And if that isn’t enough (because it totally should be!), you will also receive an autographed photo of me surfing the internet for excerpts from the book “Baby Catcher- Chronicles of a Modern Midwife” (http://www.amazon.ca/Baby-Catcher-Chronicles-Modern-Midwife/dp/0743219341“).

      Really, the way things are going now, how can you afford not to?

  8. I cracked up when I saw Ben Matlock! I hope he can be a big fan, too. At least a medium-sized fan.

  9. Ben, I am disappoint.

  10. You should *wait one hour after dinner before you rock!

    *I didn’t read all of the comments, so sorry if this was a rerun.

  11. I wouldn’t be surprised if there are tickets waiting for you at will call the next time they are in town touring.

  12. If I ever went to a Jonas Brothers concert, which will never happen in a million years, you will be able to find me very easily. I will be the guy in the nosebleed seats with the rainbow wig.

    You’ll hear me too. After every song I will be ululating at the top of my lungs. It’s my mission to bring ululating back to Western Society. I will not rest until ululating is heard at every soccer match and bus stop in North America. And maybe Central America too.

  13. Ow, my brain hurts. I guess the moral is to not plumb the depths of society’s future leaders. Because they’re illiterate.

  14. True genius to unleash Ben Matlock. Now can you introduce Karl Malden ? :)

  15. I used to be a “fan” of groups. But joining some groups could look bad for my campaign. Lately I have been looking for the “Don Mills Seal of Approval.”

  16. The talented Jonas brothers are popular even in Japan!
    http://www.japansugoi.com/wordpress/jonas-brothers-promoted-in-japan/

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