Antisocial Experiment #237
Question: What role do The Hunger Games and Twilight franchises play in communication/love/getting signed on with a major rap record label?
Hypothesis: None.
Conclusion: (See Hypothesis.)
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*You don’t have to be a rapping genius to know that in order for a thirty-something pasty white female with no rhythm to have any chance at a successful rapping career, they need to have a schtick. That’s why I came up with my own style of rapping, that I like to call “Identity Theft Rap©”.
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Welcome back to the land of the wired. Without stable internet access, my household would quickly devolve to some kind of Lord of the Flies killing fields. Also, I would not be at risk of getting random pics of privates. Maybe I should disconnect now.
Whatever you do, don’t disconnect.
Just think of all the phallus-inspired jokes you’d be missing out on…
I’ve been trying to work out a beat to your phat rhymes and the best I could muster is Master Chang’s rendition of “Neosporin” (from Kung Pow, of course). I’ll keep working on it. I’m -115% positive that you’re the next Immortal Technique (’cause all your social commentary and shit).
Thanks, Howdoesyousay! Believe it or not, I’ve been so busy becoming the next “Immortal Technique” that I had no idea the first one even existed. Luckily I was able to take a break from my controversial rapping long enough to Google him.
You’re right. Besides the raps about class struggle/government/racism and the fact that I have shinier hair, we’re totally the same!
Leatha’. Just saying.
Welcome back. I missed you and your weirdness. Especially your perpetratin’ on those poor innocent souls who are just looking for love. That I missed most of all.
Your rhymin’ be inspired, yo. Is this what love feels like, homie?
This is definitely what love feels like, homie. I know because I watch the Bachelor.
From Peeta’s mom:
It also not easy bein’ the par-RENT
Tryin’ to make the kid earn they two cent
‘specially when they equate bakery wit slavery
When all I hope is de make somethin’ savory
(Where is a baguette to whack that kid upside the head?)
Brilliant!
Word to Peea’s motha
Who can rap like no otha
All dat savory shit she make
why she need da kid to bake?
Can’t she just leave Peeta be
He gots stuff to do and people to see
Dats why he be askin’ for da dough
Da kind dat you spend, not da kind dat you roll…
Your skills and mastery of mind-fuckery are admirable. Not to mention your rapping prowess…. I bow to thee.
Gracias, cornfedgirl. Granted, I can’t take all the credit.
My dad was a modern day strolling minstrel.
Oh, Butter Girl. She lies and says she’s in love with him, can’t find a Butter Man …
… She feeds him, that’s why she’ll be back againn….
you’re on fire today Miss AWC
Thanks NM!
Oh wait…never mind…
That 22 year old student from Turkey was NOT deterred. I would give that dude another go, Bea. You just never know.
Good point. And he did have a passport….
I understood Hunger Games even less after reading this post…but now I know not to continue to waste my time manscaping as it has no positive effect for my wife.
Peeta’s rap is awesome.
I no, rite?
And he’s just so dreamy!!
I loved all of this, but the thing I laughed the most at is that you blocked out your own last name in the first Hunger Games Facebook post.
Haha! I don’t like to reveal too much about myself at once.
Identity theft is a very real concern these days.
BSchooled:
Funny …but weird.
Is this what loves feels like?
Do you also have severe joint pain and a slight feeling of nausea? If so, it is definitely love.
Either that or Lyme disease.
I <3 you lol your weird
rofl i no u r but what am i?
(*Hint: It rhymes with beird.)
This is fantastic. Randomly came across this blog while battling my nightly insomnia and decided its genius. Yessss :)
Thanks, nalacritter28. That’s what I think whenever I have insomnia, too!
ps. Had you not mentioned the part insomnia part I would have been concerned.
OMG that totally cracked me up…The army guy …that totally happen to me and he had me at hello big penis…I’m sure u understand
Is this one of your best ever?
……of curs
She needs to build up his confidence and tell him that it’s the most kick-ass penis ever. We can’t afford to have his confidence shaken. It could shake up homeland security.