John Wayne Pick-up Lines



-Girl, you look  fine as cream gravy

-Your bloomers would look great on my bedroom floor

-No, as a matter of fact that’s not a pistol in my pocket.

-What’s say we get you out of that wet bib and tucker?

-You make me hotter than a whorehouse on nickel night

-Word around the gospel mill is you like it up the spout

-Let’s you and me take French leave and ride shank’s mare over to my place

-I’ll show you my curly wolf if you show me yours…



Pick-up Lines for the Narcissistic-Chauvinist


-Do I come here often?

-If I was in charge of the alphabet, I’d put “U” in the kitchen and “I” on the couch watching sports

-I’m the guy your MILF warned you about

-That dress would look good in a heap on my bedroom floor…which could use a good vacuuming if you don’t mind

-Do you believe in love at first sight? Or are you blind as well as completely useless?

-If I said you had a beautiful body, would you promise not to turn into a  heifer once we start dating?

-Is that a mirror in your pocket? Because I need to check out my mutton chops

-Your daddy must have been a baker, because it’s obvious you have a weakness for carbs

-Is it hot in here or does your make-up always look that trashy?

-Are those space pants? Because your ass is the size of Uranus…you know, the “planet”

-Pleasure me if I’m wrong, but is your name “Vagina”?